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Consistency

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I am having trouble in my life right now for numerous reasons, but I was thinking today that one of the things that is throwing me so off balance is the lack of consistency in the most important things in my life.  I used to know what was coming next, who was here now and who would be here later.  I knew how those that I hold closest felt, both about me and about life...or so I thought.  In the last few weeks, however, I just don't know about anything.  There have been major upheavals and I'm not sure what each day will bring.  Some days my son calls home, chats openly and shares his day.  Some days he doesn't contact me at all and if I try to talk to him he mumbles and pushes me away.  Some days he's home.  Some days he isn't.  The relationship with my husband is the same way too recently.  Good.  Bad.  Hot.  Cold.  Smooth.  Bumpy.  A promising tomorrow.  An empty future. This is all very confusing t...
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Wednesday is my Friday

Today was like a Friday for me since this was the last day for the "day camp" kids this week due to my trip to North Carolina tomorrow.  It was a gorgeous day, clear and cooler after the heat and humidity that have been plaguing our area for the last many days.  I had both girls today and my Dakota and once they were all here and ready we headed out for the morning.  Our first stop was to a dear friend to drop off some much needed things for her family.  Afterward, we went to Pasadena to Lake Waterford, where I was pleasantly surprised at the lack of people there.  The kids raced to the playground and I grabbed my chair, our lunches and my phones.  While they played I made the last transfers of numbers and information from my old simple phone to my new complicated smart phone.  Now people will say you are stereotyping if you say "girls will be girls" and "boys will be boys", but if you have had both, you know this is very true!  While my boy ran...
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Brotherly Love

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Today my older son, eighteen now, but always a bit young for his age, really wanted to go to the Oriole game.  All his friends were busy and the girl he wanted to go had a dad who was saying "no way".  So my son offers to take his little brother.....the same little brother that he can't be in a room with for ten minutes lately without bickering.  Little brother is ecstatic and begs to go.  Big brother says "I'm an adult now.  I can handle it."  What's a mom to do?  I gave it some good, hard thought.....then called Dad to get his take.  He agrees it's a good bonding experience so I say okay and off they went.  So now, in my very, very quiet house, I am sitting and hoping that they really do bond tonight, that my older son will be mature enough to handle any outbursts without caving to his little brother's level.  I am praying that little brother is feeling so proud and priveliged that he is a little angel......that's really a stretch, but...
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